November 28, I somehow started is ‘journey’ again wherein I focus more on the path (which I haven’t done for the last five years). I want to reconnect to it because for the past three years, I honest feel like I’m lost somewhere and I can’t find the ‘path’.
First thing that came to mind is this: Balance of dark and light.
The moon and the sun. Yep, to represent the ‘dark and light’ for the obvious reason. Most of the time, Yin and Yang are used for this but I’m kinda drawn to these type of images as of now.
In this aspect, it simply means that everything in this world, EVERY SINGLE THING, have two sides and you need to balance both to have harmony. I know how to perfectly balance both aspects before but after having children and getting married, I feel like I’m a mess. I am not saying that kids and husband destroyed my harmony, I just can’t get on with life’s flow most of the time and right now, I’m still trying to cope up.
One of the most priceless moments that I can associate with this is when I woke up and 2 in the morning so I can breastfeed Rui (he’s a year and a month that time). I barely had any sleep yet but when I saw him smiling while he’s feeding, my heart beat faster and I felt really really thankful that I am at that moment and I got to experience that. I know most moms had that moment too at one point like you’ll realize that you can feel even more in love with this little kid even though you already love them from the moment you knew you’re pregnant.
Not only in motherhood, it also applies in life in general. Everything has two sides and it’s up to you on how you’ll take things. Would you choose to look at one side only or would you walk a bit further from it and try to see the bigger picture?