Category: Featured



This is weird. Maybe this already happened to some of you but that was the first time it happened to me.

It happened around seven to eight years ago when I was studying Wicca. I was reading Scott Cunningham’s Spell Craft and one of the simplest crafts there is the “God’s Eye”. I used a pair barbecue sticks and yarns ( purple and blue ). During the time that I am making it, all I think of is “Please show me what I must see”. I started making it in the afternoon after school, then continued ’til before bedtime. Right after I tie it, I suddenly feel exhausted and sleepy. I placed it under my pillow, hoping to get any message through my dream.

A few moments after I lay down, I started dreaming. I am kneeling before a woman in the middle of what looks like a throne/court room in a palace. I am wearing a dress that looks like it’s from 1560-70s. Women of different age, wearing the same style of dress as mine, are standing around me and the woman sitting on the throne is wearing this dress:

I know, that is Elizabeth I, one of the most remarkable monarch who ruled England and Ireland. The exact same dress but the woman that I saw in my dream looks a bit older, and her face looks fuller. That woman was shouting at me because I did something I shouldn’t do and I must leave that place immediately. The women around us are murmuring. Some agreed with her, some said I need to stay. I plead to stay, I was crying when a man wearing something that looks like an armor walked right through the crowd, pulled me on my left arm to help me stand up and said “she’s my wife…(I can’t remember what he said after that)” then we walked away. I saw that that woman sitting on that throne (or maybe it’s a … chair?) is well-known and her name is recorded in every history books (I saw books flipping, all with her photos, but I didn’t read her name). After that, I woke up.

First of all, all of the conversations in that dream are in a foreign language that I never heard of before but somehow I can understand what all of us are saying in that dream.

Second, when I started dreaming, I am already in sleep paralysis (I cannot move, I cannot shout but I am aware that I am dreaming). Another weird thing, I was lying on my bed, on my left side, I can see my room but on the right side, I can see the throne/court room.

I already tried searching online, hoping to see the face of the woman that I saw in that dream. Queen Elizabeth ruled from 1558-1603. I tried searching for other nobles or monarch who lived during that same time but I didn’t find any. Until now, I am still puzzled on why I needed to dream about that. What does it has to do with me? Who is that man (I didn’t get to see his face)? What exactly was happening in that dream?

Dreaming with such fine details doesn’t happen a lot. Nowadays, I rarely dream at all. I do not know if it’s a scene from my past life or … I don’t know. I am still looking for that woman though. C-sections made me forgetful but somehow, I cannot forget that woman’s face.



I remember her sitting beside me. Her wavy hair getting in the way for me to see her face clearly. These days, I only remember glimpses of what happened, a snapshot of that certain moment. I remember her smiling. Whatever we’re talking about, it must’ve been about her special someone ’cause she’s blushing a bit.

I can’t really remember where it happened. In the pantry maybe, or in the jeepney we’re riding home. We used to go home together because we’re on the same way but we didn’t do it a lot ’cause I’m afraid of getting attached.

You see, friendship is still a relationship and in every relationship there will always be expectations. I know what I can do for someone, specially for friends, and sometimes that makes me dumb. I hate doing dumb things for worthless people just because of some stupid reason. I’ve been there.

The sad part is I can’t remember the conversations anymore. All I know is we’re so close once that we get to talk about personal things.

She had this reputation with men. A reputation that no woman would like to be attributed to. And it’s not just with one man. There’s several of them. I never believed any of it because I trust her.

I saw how fragile she is though she’s keeping this tough act in front of everyone. She said she doesn’t care about what they’re saying, she knows the truth. She can repeat that all day but I can feel how bothered she is.

That’s one thing I love about her. She knows her weakness and she’s doing what she can to assess herself, to avoid any past mistakes and to improve herself.

It’s been a little more than three years since the last time I saw her and I don’t know if she’s still working in the same industry where we met but wherever she is, I know she’ll bloom in her own way.



Gaya ng kandilang sinindihan sa dilim, ikaw ay inilalagay sa isang sitwasyon kung saan ka dapat magsabog ng liwanag. Marami mang pagsubok na susubukang patayin ang apoy mo, may mga kamay namang handang salagin ang hangin sa paligid masiguro lang na patuloy kang mag-aalab.

Kung nasaan ka man ngayon sa buhay mo, isipin mo lagi na one way or another ikaw ay nagsisilbing liwanag para sa iba. Napupuno man ng kadiliman ang paligid mo, ang isip o damdamin mo, ‘wag kang mapagod na hanapin at alalahanin ang dahilan ng kung bakit ka nandyan sa lugar na yan at ang dahilan minsan mong pagliwanag.

Hello 2018!

Hello 2018!

Ang ganda ng simula ng 2018 ko πŸ˜€

Nung New Year’s Eve, nagka-usap kami nila kuya thru video call sa messenger and we had this picture na kumpleto kaming tatlo πŸ˜€

at least kahit sa video call lang nakumpleto kaming tatlo πŸ˜‚

A post shared by arianne balagot cantes (@mrsacbc) on


And here are some pictures while waiting for midnight πŸ™‚

Continue reading “Hello 2018!”

Balance of Dark and Light

Balance of Dark and Light

for the nth time

A post shared by arianne balagot cantes (@mrsacbc) on

November 28, I somehow started is ‘journey’ again wherein I focus more on the path (which I haven’t done for the last five years). I want to reconnect to it because for the past three years, I honest feel like I’m lost somewhere and I can’t find the ‘path’.

Continue reading “Balance of Dark and Light”

Not So Supportive and Why

Not So Supportive and Why

Alam ko hindi lahat ng tao ay biniyayaan ng supportive na katuwang sa buhay. Actually, bihira na nga makahanap ng supportive na asawa.

Yung tipong bibigyan ka ng reality check pero ipu-push ka pa rin na mag-improve sa mga bagay na gusto mong marating. ‘Yung kahit na nada-down ka na kasi parang walang pinapatunguhan yung mga efforts mo, andyan pa rin sya para sabihin na O.K. lang yan kasi passion mo yan. Sobrang bihira ng yung mga ganyang asawa.

Unfortunately, isa ang asawa ko sa mga HINDI supportive. Kapag may mga gusto akong gawin, he will allow me to do it and when I felt down about it, he will pour all the discouragements. He loves giving reality checks that most often sounds like “you’re doing something hopeless and useless again so you better stop it now”. Just like when I finally had my own domain (which means I’m already spending a bit on my blogging), I asked him to check how my blog looks and if the things that I want to do are possible. His response? “Wala namang magbabasa nyan πŸ˜€ “

Continue reading “Not So Supportive and Why”

Last Na

Nakita ko nanaman silang magkakasama, at ako naiwan nanamang nag-iisa. Sila, nandun sa tabing dagat, masayang namamasyal, nagtatampisaw at nagpapahinga. Ako naman, ito patingin-tingin na lang sa mga post nila. Lagi naman nila akong niyayaya pero ako ang tumatanggi. Bakit nga ba?

Naalala ko tuloy nung huli kaming nagkasamasama. Maaga kaming nagkita sa isang parke at kumain pa kami ng lunch na magkakasama. Pagkatapos noon ay naglibang ng saglit sa Timezone. Hindi kami kumpleto pero masaya na ‘kong makita sila, masaya akong malaman na OK sila.

Nung uwian na, nakita ko nanaman ang dahilan kung bakit ayaw kong sumasama sa mga lakad ng barkada. Napagtanto kong kahit gaano katagal ang lumipas, hindi na ‘yun magbabago. Doon ko nasabing kahit kailan hindi na ako sasamang muli sa kanila.

Iyon na ang huli.

Dying Before Your Death (Part 1)

Dying Before Your Death (Part 1)

Ever heard of someone saying “This thing happen and I just died”? Β The thing is, you see, the process of dying while you’re still alive and healthy doesn’t come in an instant. It doesn’t happen as fast as a snap of your fingers.

It is a collection of small seemingly insignificant instances that builds up through days, weeks, months and even years then one day you’ll feel like you’re doing things without passion, within too much thought and you’ll say to yourself “I don’t feel alive anymore “.

Those thoughts, once you started thinking aboit it, is actually a “make or break” point. Some people would slowly think things over and bring back ‘life’ in their lives. Some wouldn’t mind at first as if he’s still in the denial stage till one day, he would think about the same words and he would finally realize that if he doesn’t help himself, he will slowly be swallowed whole by that emptiness.

Pregnancy Scare After Tubal Ligation

Pregnancy Scare After Tubal Ligation

First of all, I know this will sound really really crazy.

I was ligated right after my last caesarean operation last May of 2016 so pretty much I already have a very very slim possibility of getting pregnant again. I am exclusively breastfeeding our youngest since birth so I had my period back when he was around 10 or 11 months old.

Since I had my period back, it never missed, not even a single day (it’s always a 28-day cycle) so when it missed for a whole week, I really started thinking crazy stuff.

First thing I thought of was “If I’m pregnant, I’ll give birth by June.” Not a single feeling of excitement, nope.Β  Somehow I just wanted to jump out of the whole nine-month pregnancy journey, which I already cherished with my three children. This time I’m more on mentally preparing for the pains of C-section (if ever I’ll actually give birth again).

Continue reading “Pregnancy Scare After Tubal Ligation”

Mercury Drug’s Suki Day Book 2018

Mercury Drug’s Suki Day Book 2018

Most people are already planning what planner to for next year. Some coffee drinkers would be collecting stickers from their beloved coffee shops, some are loyal to their usual brands and some get the cheapest but functional.

I’m not a planner kind of person. I love how fancy those planners are and it looks kikay too but I’m not gonna pay hundreds for it. I made a mistake once on buying this kikay planner with a membership card with it. There’s a long story behind it and it seems like it’s my fault entirely but no, I’m not gonna do it again. I usually buy Papemelroti’s pocket planners (Php 20.00). They are affordable and I love the designs too. It serves as a reminder for me in some way.

Yesterday I dropped by at Mercury Drug to buy stuff for my kids and I noticed this notebook at the cashier. There are three colors available that time; peach, light blue and mint green. Continue reading “Mercury Drug’s Suki Day Book 2018”