Category: #SaveLiterature

His Engagement

His Engagement

It was their 7th anniversary. He was wearing a grey long sleeves polo that accentuates his masculinity while she’s wearing an old rose halter dress that shows her every curve. They went to a studio where they had their photos taken as a memorial of their seventh year.

After their little photo shoot, they went to the restaurant where he made reservation for their dinner. Unknown to her, that was extra special. The restaurant staff are not only gathered to greet them a happy anniversary, they’re there to take and videos as he finally asked ‘the’ question.

I felt my chest aching a bit as I watched him nervously held her hand before reaching for the box inside his pants and kneeled down while all the restaurant staff around them are very excited. She wiped her tears graciously and… that’s when I closed the Facebook tab and shut down my laptop. I can’t watch beyond that. I just can’t.

I had enough internet for now and it’s only 4 in the afternoon.

That’s one thing that we all love about Facebook. Stalking has never been this easy, right ladies? Nah, just kidding.

Well, who’s that guy anyway? Let me take you back twelve years ago. The year was 2006 and I was in my senior year.

High school, like my grade school years, is pretty boring and normal. Like really, no lates, few absences, all school work, being part of the top, that’s how it is since first grade. The only ‘action’ I’m getting was sleeping in the class, getting called by the teacher to recite and still get it right.

So, going back to that guy. He is the guy I tried really hard not to like. Why? Because he is my friend. Some of you would think it’s O.K. to like him, some of you would say it’s a good decision to keep things platonic. Well, aside from him being my friend, I also don’t like the idea of ME loving someone who’s not interested. One-sided shit is not my thing. I am not prepared for that.

It started when we’re in sophomore. We used to hang out in their house with our other friends, playing video games where they let me win sometimes or we sometimes go biking around the neighborhood. At first, it’s just a simple crush. Admiring a person for his physical appearance is easy but as we spend more time together, I slowly started liking his personality too.

Senior year was a memorable year too. We’re in the same class again but this time, I was in a relationship with a guy from a different class. I know we can’t be together so I said yes to a guy who’s a bit obsessed with me.

We sit on the same row so he usually cover me up whenever I sleep in class. He made my electronics project and I did his project for home economics.

Senior ball is the final highlight of our high school life. As expected, my date for that night was my boyfriend but that didn’t stop me from dancing with all of my guy friends. We danced to (upbeat songs) ’til (sweet song) started playing. At first I thought my boyfriend would come and dance with me but instead, he came.

We danced playfully at first, making weird dance moves on such a slow, sweet song. In the middle of the song, he turned serious and hugged me a bit. “You look so happy now. I hope it stays that way” he said. He sounded so serious that I even joked about it. It’s unusual for him to act like that.

College years, we drifted part. We studied in different schools with different courses. We started having our own lives and before I knew it, we’re already graduating. A lot of things happened. I’m single for two years and I thought he is too. I thought I can finally confess to him, ’cause that time, I’m ready for it. I’m prepared to get dumped, to be honest.

That’s when I saw it on Facebook. Yeah, thanks Facebook for saving me from humiliation. His post says “She said yes, FINALLY!” I didn’t need to say it face to face huh? Universe already telling me to quit it, so I did. I didn’t attend the reunion where I’m supposed to confess my feelings. Good thing because he brought his girlfriend.

Now this. His engagement. Like, what the actual fuck? At least he’s happy, right?

 

(P.S. Posts published under #SaveLiterature are works of fiction.)

Memories

Memories

I remember her sitting beside me. Her wavy hair getting in the way for me to see her face clearly. These days, I only remember glimpses of what happened, a snapshot of that certain moment. I remember her smiling. Whatever we’re talking about, it must’ve been about her special someone ’cause she’s blushing a bit.

I can’t really remember where it happened. In the pantry maybe, or in the jeepney we’re riding home. We used to go home together because we’re on the same way but we didn’t do it a lot ’cause I’m afraid of getting attached.

You see, friendship is still a relationship and in every relationship there will always be expectations. I know what I can do for someone, specially for friends, and sometimes that makes me dumb. I hate doing dumb things for worthless people just because of some stupid reason. I’ve been there.

Continue reading “Memories”

Kilay Is Life

Alas onse ng sabado noon, kakasakay ko lang ng jeep nang may sumakay ding isang estudyante. Medyo chubby sya, hanggang baywang ang buhok at pang-rakista ang pormahan; black knitted shirt, tokong na maong at boots. Isa sa pinaka-una kong napansin sa kanya ay yung kilay nya. Usong-uso ngayon ang ‘kilay is life’ at mukhang yun din ang tina-try i.achieve ni Ate Girl to the point na nanglalaban na. Tipong di pa sya galit, mukha nanagad syang galit. Sinubukan kong iwasan na tignan sya kaso may napansin ulit ako. Akala ko may something sa bibig nya pero naka-brace pala sya at medyo hirap i.close yung labi.

Paglampas ng Buting, may sumakay na kakilala nya na kinalabit at kinausap sya. Doon ko nakita yung ngiti nya, ang ganda nya pala. Parang nagliliwanag yung buong mukha nya kapag nakangiti sya, she even have dimples. Confirmed, ‘di bagay yung kilay nya sa kanya. May kamukha syang batang artista ng GMA dati eh kaso di ko na maalala yung pangalan.

Sana next time, she’ll tone down her eyebrows, she’s more beautiful that way.

Naranasan mo na ba?

Naranasan mo na ba na kabisado mo ang sapatos ng mga tao sa paligid mo ng hindi sila tinitignan kasi nag-aalangan kang tignan sila sa mukha?

Naranasan mo na ba na pakiramdam mo palagi kang pinag-uusapan? ‘Yung  para kang takot lagi na baka may nakamasid syo?

Naranasan mo na bang papaniwalain ang sarili mo sa isang bagay para lang maging mas okay ang emotional state mo kasi nasa edge ka na? Continue reading “Naranasan mo na ba?”

Kandila

Kandila

Gaya ng kandilang sinindihan sa dilim, ikaw ay inilalagay sa isang sitwasyon kung saan ka dapat magsabog ng liwanag. Marami mang pagsubok na susubukang patayin ang apoy mo, may mga kamay namang handang salagin ang hangin sa paligid masiguro lang na patuloy kang mag-aalab.

Kung nasaan ka man ngayon sa buhay mo, isipin mo lagi na one way or another ikaw ay nagsisilbing liwanag para sa iba. Napupuno man ng kadiliman ang paligid mo, ang isip o damdamin mo, ‘wag kang mapagod na hanapin at alalahanin ang dahilan ng kung bakit ka nandyan sa lugar na yan at ang dahilan minsan mong pagliwanag.

Guilt

The other day you said you can’t sleep because you feel guilty. I thought you’re guilty because you’re hurting me, but I was wrong.

You’re guilty because of what you did to her. I don’t really understand that part but I think what you mean to say was you’re guilty because you involved her in whatever plan you have. My heart got pierced and since then, it’s been hurting like hell.

Well, who cares? At least you’re not bored anymore. And at least, after years of numbness, I can finally feel something again eventhough it’s pain.

Last Na

Nakita ko nanaman silang magkakasama, at ako naiwan nanamang nag-iisa. Sila, nandun sa tabing dagat, masayang namamasyal, nagtatampisaw at nagpapahinga. Ako naman, ito patingin-tingin na lang sa mga post nila. Lagi naman nila akong niyayaya pero ako ang tumatanggi. Bakit nga ba?

Naalala ko tuloy nung huli kaming nagkasamasama. Maaga kaming nagkita sa isang parke at kumain pa kami ng lunch na magkakasama. Pagkatapos noon ay naglibang ng saglit sa Timezone. Hindi kami kumpleto pero masaya na ‘kong makita sila, masaya akong malaman na OK sila.

Nung uwian na, nakita ko nanaman ang dahilan kung bakit ayaw kong sumasama sa mga lakad ng barkada. Napagtanto kong kahit gaano katagal ang lumipas, hindi na ‘yun magbabago. Doon ko nasabing kahit kailan hindi na ako sasamang muli sa kanila.

Iyon na ang huli.

Balisong

Ilang taon na nga ba? Halos labingwalong taon na din pala mula nang una kong mapansin yung weirdo mong mukha. Sa fourth row ako nakaupo noon, sa tabi ng pader. Ikaw naman nasa second or thrid row sa kabilang side ng kwarto. Pareho tayong transferee na first year high school students noon. Ang puti at ang gwapo mo, matangkad ka rin pero masyado kang baby face. As in mukha kang totoy sa katawan ng isang high school student.
Sabi nila para kang alien kasi patulis yung mukha mong sobrang payat. Pati buong katawan mo, napakapayat na para bang kayang kaya kang tangayin ng hangin. Napakahinhin mo din maglakad at
July 12 nang ayusin ni Maam ang seat plan natin. Yun ang umpisa kung bakit ko naging favorite ang Science. Araw-araw ko ng inaabangan yung subject na yun kasi naman, yun lang yung time na magkakatabi tayo. Oo! Grabe inspiration yun!
Pagkatapos ng ilang linggo eh nagkatabi ulit tayo sa ibang subject kaya grabe ang palakpak ng tenga ko nun! Mas pinagbigyan pa ko ni Lord nang pati sa homeroom (umpisa at last period natin) eh magkatabi tayo.
Juice colored! Imagine starting and ending your day beside your inspiration? No wonder why I’m always at the top of our class.
One day you came into our room and first thing you did was to show this little toy of yours. Isang balisong. You loved playing with it. You even showed me how to twist and turn it in my hands. I can still see your lips moving when you said something that morning. Then, there’s your smile that made my heart beat a little bit faster. I can’t remember the words now but that day will always remain.

Ikaw

Ikaw ang nagbigay ng mga bagay na ‘di ko hingi

Ikaw ang nagparamdam ng mga damdaming ayaw kong pansinin

Ikaw ang unang nagsabi ng mga salitang ayaw kong marinig at ayaw kong sabihin

Ngunit sa kabila ng lahat, ikaw pa rin ang aking lakas

Ikaw pa rin ang dahilan kung bakit ako makapangyarihan.

 

[In response to Daily Prompt : Mighty]

Just (Another) Quick One : Hobbies,  Passion and Being a Mom

I was looking at my Instagram feed when I saw this photo by one of my high school friends. An aspiring photographer who takes above average photos (not that I have high standards) and he,  just like me,  loves using nature as his subject.

I went on looking at his photos when I realized that I used to love taking photos and looking at nature photography.  Now,  I just love looking at them.

I know most parents experience this at one point especially stay-at-home moms like me.  That moment when you suddenly just miss doing those things that you’re terribly passionate about,  like photography for instance. You can feel the passion,  the excitement and the anticipation thinking when you can do the things you used to do. Somehow imagining what you would do and where you’d go to when you get the chance. For a minute,  you’re flying there planning with a little too much bit of excitement.

Continue reading “Just (Another) Quick One : Hobbies,  Passion and Being a Mom”